Inspired Elephant
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Events
    • Vision Boards >
      • VB Kit
    • Writing for Clarity Workshop
  • About
    • Founders

The Importance of Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone

4/23/2022

Comments

 
Picture
Hiya Herd Sis,

I want to talk to you about getting out of your comfort zone.

Sometimes that means learning a new task or skill, going to a party when it’s more comforting to stay home with a good book, or embarking on a new career or creative endeavor.

In this particular case, it’s about, getting out of your surroundings.

Just a few days ago over high tea (When in Rome, People! Or in this case, London.), my eldest turned me to me and said, "Thank you for getting me to go this trip.  I didn't realize how badly I needed to just get away for a bit."  

Sometimes, we are so entrenched in our day-to-day that we don’t realize that we just need a break from it all.  
​

I, in turn, thanked her for getting me outside my comfort zone.  It wasn’t an easy decision to allow her to attend college abroad.  I hadn’t flown overseas in over 15 years and admittedly , I was nervous.  I kept having to remind myself that, once upon a time, I did this with ease AND without a smart phone!

This last-minute, against-all-odds trip got us both outside of our environments and comfort zones; something we both desperately needed.  She initially balked due to a looming project and work.  And I nearly canceled due to a sick pet.  

In the days and moments leading up to the decision to go or not, it just seemed easier to each of us to tend to our home needs.  To stay entrenched in our routines.

What changed?  Well, couple of things:
  • I had loads of encouragement and support from my better half.  In fact, he asked me, what do you really want to do?  Without hesitation, I answered, "See my girl."
  • I’m also trying to leap more as its my word of the year.  Honestly, if not now, then when?!  There will always be work.  There will never be an ideal time to just slip away. 
You see, sometimes our comfort zones aren't so comforting.  They are just familiar routines that keep us where we are. 

If we stay where we are, nothing will change and that includes us.  There is no room for growth, opportunities, or awe in our comfort zones.


This trip was a leap out of my comfort zone.  The first of many.

Getting out of dodge not only brought my daughter and I together for a few days, it gave us new perspective and appreciation for taking a break.

Friends, do yourself a favor and give yourselves the break you deserve and need.  You don't have to jump the pond to do it either!
  • Take a mental health day and ask yourself, "What do I want today?"  There are no wrong answers!  Just honor your desires.
  • If you are one to sit at your desk for lunch, take yourself out!  Step away from your desk and piles.  Even if it's just for a walk.
  • Say no to obligations more and say yes to things, people, and activities that bring you joy.

Please share with us in the comments below, all the ways you are getting out of your comfort zone. You know you'll always find all the support you need in the Herd!

Cheers,
Carolyn



Comments

March is your month to shine

3/8/2022

Comments

 
On this International Women’s Day, we toast to and celebrate all the classy, sassy, and bad-assy women in our lives.

But honestly, why just limit it to just one day?

The entire month of March is dedicated to celebrating the contributions of women. 

Frankly speaking, we celebrate the other 11 months too, but during March we highlight and are grateful for the sacrifices made by women, for women to help our world be a more inclusive place. 

And every year, that list grows.

Clink, clink.  Raise your glass, please.


To the moms, the grandmas, aunts, sisters, cousins, wives and girlfriends, bosses, colleagues, students and teachers, neighbors near and far.  We love you.

To the creators, entrepreneurs, glass-ceiling shatterers, visionaries, thought-leaders, trailblazers, and whistleblowers. We revere you.

To the ones experiencing turmoil and challenges, you are stronger than you think.  We support you.

And to all members of our Inspired Herd.  No one is stronger, more supportive, empathetic, kind, and more amazing than YOU.  We appreciate you.    

Keep shining your light.  Each one of us is like a star in the night sky, illuminating the darkness. 
Together, we shine like the sun.

​#breakthebias



Comments

My word for the year 2022 is LEAP

1/19/2022

Comments

 
Picture
Hey Herd Sister,

Now it's time to share my Word of the Year for 2022. Last year, my word was flow, and I focused on being less resistant and allowing. If you missed it, read about it here.
​

This year, I want to take action.

I am a chronic overthinker and can talk myself out of just about anything from a morning workout that I know will make me feel great, to trying new avenues in my career.

I'm past my mid-century point. When I think about that, images of a roller coaster come to mind. I'm just over the apex of the tallest hill, hovering in the seconds before the thrill of plummeting downward. 

​I'm caught in that brief moment of razor-sharp clarity where I realize this ride will come to an end, and the time to have fun and take chances is NOW.

Who knew roller coasters could be so revelatory?

I don't feel old, but I am aware of the passage of time and how quickly it can go by. What's the point of even being on the ride if I am filled with fear and regret? I want to take in the aerial views and throw my hands up in the air.

I want to LEAP.  

Ok, not off the roller coaster, per se, but into life!  

I want to stop second-guessing myself and trust my initial instincts. I want to have faith that the Universe always has my back, no matter what.  

And ultimately, I want to have faith in ME.

Taking a Leap means:
  • Facing fear regularly. Like most other things in life, the more I do this, the better I will get at staring fear in the face.
  • Feeling more exhilarated. When I step outside my comfort zone, I am forced off of auto-pilot and into being present.
  • Being open to possibilities. I do believe that the more options I explore, the more opportunities the Universe will present to me.
  • Realizing freedom from my own fear-induced, self-imposed limits.
  • Intuiting more. By trusting my inner voice, I hope to drown out her buzzkill roomate, Negative Nelly.​
​
I may not become a Leaper overnight. It will happen in the most minor ways, like pulling the trigger on the roman shades that I know I love but continue to talk myself out of.

Or recently, when I purchased a ticket to a workshop to see a favorite author and speaker.

I had just finished listening to a seminar she gave when I thought how I would regret not ever having seen her in person.  So I followed my instincts, clicked through her website, and bought the non-refundable ticket for a workshop… in Amsterdam.  


Oh yes, I did!

Without buying the plane tickets, without having a hotel booked. Without having it all figured out. 

I Leaped.

Or leapt, for you Brits. And I am so looking forward to that trip.


But back to that roller coaster imagery and my word for 2022, I am no longer white-knuckled and filled with worry.

Sitting on top of the world and sensing the gravitational pull of a thrilling ride I know will end, I throw my hands up in surrender of my need for control and having all the answers.

This year, I leap, and I hope you do too.

Lots of love,
Carolyn

Comments

How to turn what-if worry thoughts into positive action

12/1/2021

Comments

 
Hiya Herd,

I have a confession to make.  

When I was in college, I had my first tarot card reading. After turning over the Rabbit card depicting a bunny with an ominous eagle looming overhead, the psychic told me that I focused too much on what could go wrong.  So much so, in fact, that it was like I was openly inviting calamity in.

She ended the reading by encouraging me to have faith in myself and the Universe instead. 

Pissed that I spent drinking money on this lame piece of advice, I nodded, smiled politely, and thought, “Okay, crazy lady.  This is my LIFE we are talking about and a lot of other serious shit COULD realistically happen.  And then what do I do?!"

​Maybe it was part of my perfectionist mindset that I just wanted to get everything right from the get-go.  In order to do so, I would evaluate every possible thing that could derail me so I could have a plan A, B, C, and sometimes all the way to Z.
Picture
I lived many years that way.  It was exhausting and not at all fulfilling.

You see, Herd.... I was a Chronic What-Iffer.

What-if thoughts show up when you are about to try something new or take a risk.  When the what-ifs are unleashed, it’s like a lantern-fly infestation.   They are pervasive and distracting, fluttering around in your mind, taking your eye off the prize and onto all that can go wrong.

The result? 

What-ifs stop you from taking any kind of inspired action by keeping you trapped in fear.

Think about it.  If you follow a what-if worry stream all the way through, you are so far down a rabbit hole (Gasp! like that tarot card), far away from your original goal.  What-ifs take you away from your desires, keeping you playing safe and small.

If this sounds like you, even if just at times, I invite you to explore a different perspective on what-if thoughts.

Instead of focusing on what could go wrong, how about exploring what can go right?

For example, let's say you are considering quitting your day job to take your passion project to the next level.  Instead of ruminating on, “What if I fail?",  consider this:

What if it all works out?  Cue heavenly music.
Picture
By reframing* your what-ifs into positive scenarios, the vibration of your desire will increase over that of your fear.

In this mindset, you can take inspired action steps toward your goals because you feel hopeful and empowered.  Fearful thoughts are crowded out while desire takes center stage.  They are still in your mind.  It's just that they have been relegated to the far corners... where they belong.

While you can’t 100% control or even get rid of your thoughts, you can mindfully choose them.

Famed author, Netflix celeb, and Goddess of Decluttering, Mari Kondo, asks this question of her clients: 

“Does it spark joy?”.  

She stresses that this critical and final question in the process of tidying is less about elimination than it is about what you want to keep in your home and life.

Let's apply her life-changing magic to what-if thoughts:  
  • What if fail?
  • What if I embarrass myself? 
  • What if I suck? 

Are these the kinds of thoughts you choose to keep?  How do they serve you?  How do they make you feel?

Now let’s flip the switch to: 
  • What if I love this new position? 
  • What if I succeed?
  • What if I make beaucoup bucks???
​How do these thoughts feel to you?  Do they #sparkjoy?

While we are never completely fearless, we can fear LESS by turning the negative questions into positive ones.
Try this practice.  Not only on yourself but for any friend, loved one, or colleague that shares their fears with you.  Watch the expression on their faces and their energy instantly shift when you invite them to consider it all working out for them.

Give them and yourselves the permission to feel like it will all work out. 

SPOILER ALERT: It always does.

​As a recovering perfectionist and chronic what-iffer, I am asking you to SAY YES to the opportunity that lies just outside your comfort zone.
  • Take the chance. 
  • Sign up for tango lessons. 
  • Learn a new language. 
  • Start the business. 
  • Buy the ticket.
  • Ditch the stale relationship. 
  • Try the weird, foreign food you can't even pronounce.

Picture
​While I wish my younger self knew this, I don't have any regrets.  I am living the life I have always dreamed of NOW.  I am traveling, Cher and I created this awesome community called Inspired Elephant (Herd of it?), and I am finally taking tennis lessons at the age of 50.

Take it from me.  Don't waste your life away by asking yourself what can go wrong. Start focusing on everything that can go right.

Now it's your turn. 

How many “what ifs” have you asked in life? Are they helpful or destructive? Do you have any tips?  Please comment below!

XO,
Carolyn

* Reframing is one of our favorite self-care tools.  If you didn’t catch our post on reframing called How to Make Work Feel Like Play, check it out here
Comments
<<Previous

    More Inspiration

    All
    FearLESS
    Manifesting
    Self Care Tips

Contact Us
Let's Be Social