Starting Is The Hard Part
"We all gotta start somewhere."
This is the phrase I repeated to myself as I grabbed my yoga mat and headed out the door at 5:15 am. I had booked a hot yoga class at my former studio after not having been in the studio since just before Covid over three years ago. I was so nervous about going, thinking they'd have to call 911 to cart my sweaty, out-of-shape ass out of there. But I survived. In fact, I held my own. It's not where I used to be, but it's where I am now, and that's okay.
Wherever you are right now is ok, too, with no explanations or excuses.
You are always becoming. That's what it means to live. Every day, every choice, every moment is a new beginning. So don't condemn your starting point! Learn to honor your continuous evolution. And you can only evolve if you start somewhere. In a prior blog post, I addressed the importance of having compassion for ourselves and offered a 4-step process for self-acceptance. If you missed it, check it out here.
When it comes to beginnings, your inner judge can be super harsh. It can even make you want to quit after just one imperfect attempt. Or if it’s anything like mine, it can make you not even want to try. My judge will shame me so much about where I am that I continue to put off attempting. I hide behind busyness and excuses. And then I wonder why nothing ever changes. Crazy, I know!
Best-selling author and inspirational speaker Esther Hicks uses the comparison of a toddler taking its first unsteady steps. After a wobble or a tumble, you would never say, "Get up, you little dummy. You're not doing it right!".
Or do you remember learning to ride a bike? Lots of wobble there, too. But you likely did it with the support of a grown-up running alongside you, encouraging you the whole way. There was no one knocking you down. Literally or figuratively, I hope!
There was never a doubt that you wouldn't master either of these things. So why beat yourself up?
Compassion frees you from having to have it all done, get it all right, or be a perfected version of yourself. It's like your Get Out of Jail Free card for life.
Embracing where you are today is the most critical part of the process of where you want to go and who you want to be.
Repeat after me:
It's all right where I am.
I am where I'm meant to be.
My less-than-graceful attempt at yoga was amazing because I finally did it! I am on my way to being healthy, fit, and zen, which is who I am deep in my soul. My yoga class was like putting my hands in the clay to begin creating art. It may not look pretty yet, but it's getting there!
Do you know what else is interesting about beginnings? It’s the first and hardest part of the process. Once we do the thing we’ve put off doing or have fear around doing, we realize it wasn’t so scary after all. The next attempt will be much less daunting because we feel capable after having already started.
So much so that I go to my next yoga class tomorrow evening.
So please celebrate the wholeness of who you are right now in this messy moment. Because as long as you keep showing up for yourself, your success is inevitable.
YOU are a masterpiece in the making.
If you couldn’t tell, this is as much a message for you as it is for me.
With so much love from one of your biggest fans,
Carolyn